Cupcake and a chat?

It is important to build a positive relationship with our children. Life is busy and we often run from one activity to the next. However, one of my clients recently started having a special time with their daughter – they called it “cup cake time!”  She took her to the local coffee shop and they enjoyed cup cakes together (and of course they talked!).

Cup cakes are popular at the moment with all ages – but the magic is in the one on one time. Sometimes it is hard to connect with young people (especially if they are teenagers), so below are a few conversation starters that may help.

• If your friends were cupcakes – what type of cakes would they be and why?
• If your friends were animals- what type of animals would they be and why?
• What is your favourite type of cupcake?
• How are the teachers going at your school – are the kids stressing them out?
• Talk about your child interests and activities.
• Talk about special times you have shared as a family.

The time spent one on one is important – not what you talk about! Young people need to know that adults care and are there to support them. If parents keep the lines of communication open with young people, they are more likely to come and talk when things get tough.

In Victoria, children must be five years of age or older by the 30th of April in the year they start school. Often parents question why the 30th of April is the cut off date and there is clear explanation why. Children develop at different rates and the decision to begin school often only based on age.

Is my child ready for school?

How do you know if your child is ready for school?
Preschool field officers may visit your child’s preschool to assess your child. They may use a check list to assess your child in the following areas:

• Play skills
• Social development
• Cognitive development
• Fine motor skills
• Language and communication skills
• Emotional development
• Self care skills
• Gross motor skills

Is my child ready for school?
If you have doubts about your child being able to begin school and cope academically, it might be a good idea to have them assessed with a standardised intelligence test. This gives parents a clear indication of where their child fits or stands compared with children of a similar age.

You should also talk with your child’s preschool teacher. They are experts in this area as they see large numbers of children and can offer a professional opinion based on a child’s developmental stage.

Preschool teachers may also recommend a cognitive assessment to test intellectual capacity. There are also many other reasons to conduct a cognitive assessment.

Can my child start school early?
The answer is yes – but it is often a lengthy process! Parents will need to provide evidence that their child is emotionally ready for school and that they are academically ready for school.

• Evidence that a child is emotionally ready can be gained from a child’s preschool teacher.
• Evidence that a child is academically ready needs to be assessed by a qualified psychologist.

School Psychology Services offers an assessment that tests the intellectual capacity of young people. This assessment is called the Wechsler Preschool & Primary Scale of Intelligence (WPPSI – pronounced “WHIP SEE”). This test assesses intelligence. For a psychologist to support an early entry to school, a child must be in the gifted range on this test. The gifted range means that they are exceptional, not just above average.

More information about early entry to school in Victoria is available from the Department of Education.

The pace that society moves in this techno-gadget new world order is amazing! Young people are experts at multitasking – homework, talking with friends and surfing the net while sending a text is common in a young person’s bedroom!

People are becoming techno junkies – they are afraid to be away from their computer for too long.

The brain processes of individuals needing to always be connected are similar to those addicted to drugs. Sometimes it seems that there is no escape!

What can parents and teachers do if they suspect a young person is addicted?

Key Ideas:

• Explain to the individual the problems associated with addiction (i.e. Social withdrawal, bright lights at night may affect sleep, importance of reducing number of hours “Plugged in” etc ).
• Individual must recognise there is a problem – if any progress is to be made.
• Limit technology use – where possible. However, withdrawal may result in increased levels of anxiety.
• Suggest an alternative to technology use, such as talking with friends face to face, doing some exercise or reading a “paper” book.

Useful Information:

• Kids and Tech: How much is too much?
• Personal Tech Addiction Snares Teens, Adults
• Teenagers at Risk of Internet addiction
• The rise of Technology addiction
• How to Tell If You Are Addicted to Technology